Sunday, December 30, 2012

On "Gay or Hipster?"

I like art and music.  As such, I often find myself in places full of hipsters.  As such, when I'm at a concert, or an art show, or even just out with friends, if I see a well-dressed, reasonably attractive guy, I'm confronted with a question -- is he gay or just a hipster?  (This is not, of course, to mean that the two are mutually-exclusive.)  As such, I've decided to give you, my darling readers, a list of possible ways to tell the difference.
  • If he's wearing a bow-tie:
    • And looks like Doctor Who or a lumberjack: hipster.
    • And looks like Blaine Anderson: probably gay.
  • If he compliments your taste in music: probably a hipster.
    • UNLESS it's Lady Gaga, Cher, or Madonna, in which case, probably gay.
  • If he admits to appreciating Carly Rae Jepsen un-ironically: either gay or a frat boy, but definitely not a hipster
  • If he's at a museum:
    • With his mother: avoid at all costs.
    • With his girlfriend: hipster (and likely whipped)
    • With his boyfriend: gay (duh)
  • If he's wearing a "SOME __ MARRY ___.  GET OVER IT." t-shirt: gay.  Or just awesome.  Or both.
And now that I've offended a good number of people, we'll end this list.  Feel free to email or comment with more ways to tell the difference, and make the lives of single girls who are attracted to well-dressed men everywhere easier.  Because in a world of Neil Patrick Harrises, Matt Bomers, Tyler Oakleys, and more, we need to stand a fighting chance.

Tune in again for "Nerd or Hipster" when I tell you how to know if that guy in the wolf t-shirt is doing so ironically or because he's a member of a one-man wolfpack.

Best of luck,
Rachel Leigh

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